Team-building and Introverts . . . hahaha!

Those of you who follow my recent posts on Facebook will remember this video from the other day:

It's called "The Power of Introverts." The speaker, Susan Cain, brings up many, many points that really hit home with me.

This video helped me understand several things about myself:

It helped me understand why I didn't "fit in" on the girls' basketball team in high school. Why I didn't "get" how everyone on the team wearing the same nail polish would "build team unity" (but I did anyway, even though I hate wearing nail polish). Why I didn't get "pumped up" by our team cheers. Why I ducked out of each and every pep rally I possibly could. Why I was actually just fine with not getting asked to a dance. Why I didn't feel like attending (and didn't attend) my high school graduation.

And those feelings were perfectly healthy.

I'm an introvert. It simply means that after time in a group setting, especially a large group setting, I need alone time in order to re-energize myself.

After tryouts for the junior year basketball team, Kaylene and I (two of the few introverts on the team) were cut. My friend Ashley (another introvert) stayed on, but she told me later that the coach pulled her aside, like he had with Kaylene and me, and told her basically that she had "barely" made the team.

Oh, introverts. Coaches, leaders, and teachers often don't know what to do with us.

Coming into more current times, I found myself having to encourage young women in my ward to go to girls camp. I did not like girls camp as a young woman. No I don't have any horror stories (other than having my period start the morning we were to head out to a camp that had few bathroom facilities and several stories of bear sightings between our cabins and the bathrooms.) No horror stories . . .  just we were never given any time away from "the group." And I burned out really fast, opting to leave early pretending to be sick.

Thus, it was hard for me in my current church calling (laurels advisor) to gung ho-ly encourage all the young women to not only go to camp, but to love camp. To promise them spiritual experiences.

For a church and community who hold personal revelation as something so very, very precious (we are encouraged to pray and commune with God in private every day), it seems odd how so many camp activities are aimed at forcing people into group "bonding" activities to "create unity" in the stake (or to sit and listen to overlong devotionals). Little time is given for actually escaping into the wilderness and having those private moments that are so important for personal revelation to occur.

Joseph had the Sacred Grove. Jesus had the Mount of Olives. Moses had Sinai.

Thoreau had Walden Pond. Ansel Adams, Yosemite.

Yet the girls - who are promised great spiritual experiences if they come prepared - are hustled from one corner of the campground to another. Extroverts probably love the experience. But for introverts (or at least for myself), it was difficult. I remembered wondering why I couldn't even have my morning or my evening free from scheduled activities? Even fifteen minutes to just sit down with a book of my own choosing! Time to wander (watching out for bears, of course) and meditate on my own?

More could be said. I have many more experiences that make me wish to call on stake presidents and leaders everywhere and tell them that for some people, even teens, bonding and relationship-building happens in smaller group settings. In little serendipitous exchanges when no activity has been planned, no bonding forced.

And now I know I'm not the only one who feels this way!

This post isn't meant to merely be a call-out to stake leadership of YW camps, but also a call out to anyone, anywhere in any kind of leadership position to remember the introverts! Plan fairly, so extrovert and introvert alike will flourish under your care.

Meantime, until society's views towards us introverts changes, I'll do what I can to allow my fellow introverts their Sinais, Waldens, and Yosemites.